i am bored.. sick of studying.. sick of doing assignment..

i email him wee morning today.. he said we will tok tonight...now at the end of our 25 mins conversation.. we talked nothing abt the problem we had.. other problem is more important den ours.i love to listen to his prob at work. but i prefer to solve ours first.i am selfish and not understandin again. sucks! now he is goin out for some socialising .. i bet no talkin for the weekend again.. tok again on monday.. i really hate this feeling..had this feelin for the past 3 weeks. i am not happy.. no body cares... i hate this!i hate myself!i am disappointment once again.. how i wish i have no feeling.. i wish i didnt love anyone except myself..i am pathetic..i hate hate myself!!

there is a million questions in my head.. i couldnt do my assignment.. y do i have to be more understanding wen i am tryin? y do u have to say i shattered it all wen i merely said that u didnt tell mi ur whereabouts.it is true i was upset for a moment.. coz i feel that u think it wasnt important for mi to know where r u.. well. looking back, i think i am juz being nonsense.. y do i have to be upset over something small. but the phrase 'shattered it all' hurts mi.. it is my fault again.. i am not understandin.. haiz.. i wanna say that y do i always have to be the one who beunderstandin wen u r not.. y u didnt think u got to be understandin wen i am concern abt u.. well.. i dun think u will. coz i am not understanding.. i am sick of understandin.. understandin = do things that u like and i have to understand y u do that.. how abt u?

i am supposed to be studyin but i am not.. i am not sure y did i feel so empty wen i woke up this morning.. have been sleepin kinda little lately.. due to birds chirpin and unnecessay noises in the house..
i am bored, empty.. i wanna have fun.. enuf of sch!

it is Mc bday today.. didnt do much except for giving him a jacket wen i went back home and i sent him a college... i bought a brownie to celelbrate with him but he is out with his colleagues.. so i eat it tomoro..
suffocated with assignments lately..there is endless readings and honoestly i dun know how ma i goin to do it..i am stress..i need this second half of the year to zoom by fast.. too bad it doesnt..
watching big bang theory lately.. does it pay to be smart?